Is Throning Actually Worse Than Shrekking?
Another day, another toxic dating trend emerges on TikTok. “Throning” refers to intentionally dating someone with social influence, popularity, or clout to enhance your own image, explains therapist and dating coach Kesley Wonderlin. The emphasis lies on the benefits gained from the association, not the partner as a person.
In other words, you place your partner on a pedestal—or a throne, as the term implies. This behavior closely resembles “dating up” and stems from the same DatingTok subculture that promotes ideas like “high-value dating,” urging singles to seek partners based on status, looks, money, or influence.
Many experts agree this trend is unhealthy. Relationship coach Amie Leadingham states,
“When someone is throning you, they’re attracted to what you have or what you represent, not who you actually are. You’re more like a trophy or an accessory to make them look better.”
While being treated like a prize might seem appealing to those feeling undervalued in relationships, Leadingham warns that such praise is only superficial and will eventually become exhausting.
Author’s summary: Throning is a toxic dating trend centered on social status rather than genuine connection, reducing partners to symbols rather than individuals.